Category: Uncategorized

ok, this green guy has to stop flirting w me.. or what ever he’s doing.. coz he’s giving me some nerves.. good nerves, ofcourse.. but still..
Had a warm chat my old lust.. and perhaps he’s still a present lust.. coz I realize I still feel that connection w him… perhaps he still feels the same.. but I guess he’s just trying to redefine our boundaries after all the bitter he made me go through.. friendship is always better, isn’t it? especially w a guy who hasn’t been able to make up his mind..
Had dinner w my.. i don’t know what to call him.. and he is.. demanding as usual..I fall w someone who expects me to serve him all the time.. although I don’t mind pampering the people I care for.. I think there’s a fine line between devotion and  slavery… there is still that tiny bit of hope that I unconsiously  carry  w me.. but seeing him with his infamous ignorance and ‘harsh’ manners.. I just.. well, it’s only logical to not take it anymore.. and my best friend commented w "why did you even invite him for dinner?" why.. I guess.. partially coz I miss spending time w him.. partially bc I guess I wanted to see if there’s still something there..
perhaps it’s not there anymore.. hmm… seriously, I don’t know what we are any more..
I feel kind of scattered with scattered pieces of my heart spread in the unique encounters with men whom I thought would shed some hope.. for a sensible future..
And why.. again, these encounters led me to nothing but mere playfulness and eventually bitterness..
I was thinking of these words.. when I found that surprising remark from the green guy.. and he said it once before.. so I’m like.. what are you trying pull here, man..
and suddenly my hope rose.. probably it wasn’t even hope.. Perhaps it was just a spark.. to lighten up my day.. It doesn’t hurt to have some one you don’t even know well going on and on about good qualities about your self when ur just about to break down for the zillionth time… and perhaps it doesn’t hurt to think that maybe.. just maybe.. there is yet another hope…
Only God knows best..

ok, this green guy has to stop flirting w me.. or what ever he's doing.. coz he's giving me some nerves.. good nerves, ofcourse.. but still..Had a warm chat my old lust.. and perhaps he's still a present lust.. coz...